The Wrath of Gregory's Arch Nemesis
by Saiororen
Summary: If this isn't the last one, then this is Timeline A :(
1. Chapter 1

Greg was floating in a white space. Suddenly he was sucked in a direction that could only be described as up.

A golden glow enveloped him and he felt himself turned in a 4th dimensional direction.

He came face to face with a man so handsome, strong and radiant that he knew it must be a god.

"I am Adam", said the man, "the father of mankind"

"For the past 70 years of your existence, you have been a disappointment" he said his voice booming, coming from all directions at once.

"Yet..", said the man, his glowing eyes burning into the depths of Greg's soul, "you have a great potential within you"

Suddenly Greg began experience what he could only describe as expanding, and became a four dimensional creature.

Greg was surprised to see that Adam was a being of 4 dimensions, but yet remained as handsome and radiant as before.

Reading Greg's mind, Adam spoke, "I am beyond all spatial dimensions... The epitome of human achievement. My power is only bounded by the [INCOMPREHENSIBLE-TERM]"

Greg gazed out and he could see in front of him his mortal universe. From his location, his universe appeared to be a small tapestry on a wall.

"Return" commanded Adam

A force seized Greg and he began shooting towards the mortal world. As he got closer he began being squeezed through fractional dimensions, until finally he returned to the mortal plane in 3 dimensions.

Greg looked out in front of him and saw the seemingly endless void of space.

Suddenly he accelerated. Moving massively beyond light speed, and he was at Earth. Then as he began falling to Earth he began being compressed into a lower dimension at an even higher rate than before. 2.9 dimensional, 2.5 dimensional, 1 dimensional... 0.

Greg disappeared in a flash.


	2. Chapter 2

Greg awoke in his 18 year old form once more, and groaned.

It seemed that even when he wasn't a degenerate with his online behavior his life sucked as long as he was addicted.

Greg swore on his life that he would never follow the same path.

At that moment the timeline split.

Timeline A:

10 years later.

Greg was 28 years old. His vision was near-blind from his constant Internet use. He was still a virgin. He was fat and smelly, but most importantly, he was a socially anxious, incompetent, self-loathing wreck.

He constantly was thinking either strange fantasies or negative self-talk, he could not even clear his thoughts for a second. He kept trying to change but could not.

As he began surfing in order to punish himself for being a degenerate, his phone exploded. Greg fell to the ground, clutching his mangled hand and sobbing.

Suddenly a blob of smooth flesh appeared floating in the air several feet from Greg. The blob expanded and then formed into a human shape.

Greg recalling vague bits of knowledge from his youth, realized that this a 4-dimensional humanoid entering his universe.

The human materialized in crystal clear detail. He had high cheekbones, a very strong jaw, hunter eyes, and every single attractive trait you could think of plus more you didn't. His eyes were ice-blue and glowed softly. In fact his whole body had a glow so faint, that it seemed to be only a mental thing.

His hair looked like it was made of literal gold, and it was shaped into curling braids that flowed down both sides of the man's face.

The man smiled his perfect white teeth nearly blinding Greg. "Who's your daddy?!" the man roared, his voice booming from nearly everywhere in the room at once. He waved his hands and Greg could see lightning flow through his veins and out his hand.

A bolt of lightning struck Greg causing him to spasm and fly back hitting the wall.

Suddenly, something became very clear to Greg. The man in front of him was Greg.

"Right!" he spoke reading Greg's thoughts and his voice boomed almost as if the room itself spoke, even though he did not even move his lips.

"H... h.. how?" asked Greg.

The other man, who shall henceforth go by Gregory said, "The brilliance of a mind unchained of screen-slavery is something to behold"

Gregory walked forward, with slow, measured, powerful steps. His hand became intangible and he used it to grip Greg's jaw. Then he began moving in a 4th dimensional direction. Greg shut his eyes in fear.


	3. Chapter 3

Greg Heffley was not having a good day. He had recently returned from a July 4th celebration, and felt horrible about how socially anxious and awkward he had been.

"I got to do something different..." Greg pondered, gulping as he realized the horrible future awaiting him if he continued on his current internet-addicted path.

A translucent blue screen materialized in Greg's room, and out of it stepped the most handsome man Greg had seen in his life, while falling out the other end, was a hideous neckbeard slob that Greg knew could only be his future self.

Gregory spoke, "You are of the inferior line, and I have come to show you the creature you become". At this Gregory waved his hand and Greg's future self floated towards Greg, carried by telekinetic energy.

Greg backed up nearly vomiting from the stench.

Gregory waved his hand again and Greg's future self turned into smoke and was sucked into the blue portal which closed.

"You've gotten three warnings Greg. Why do you not change?" Gregory questioned. Even though his voice was calm and even a little quiet, it carried such an intense feeling that Greg nearly collapsed.

Suddenly Greg's life began playing in fast forward. He say himself go into bed, and then a splitting into alternate selves.

The next morning the first one awake, got ready for the day and began immediately browsing. The second repeated this except instead began studying Area N, a hot new field of study.

As time sped up, the first one became more and more depressed, weak, fat and ugly. The opposite process seemed to be happening for the second. Greg could see all his dreams come true in the second one, all the girls, wealth and power a wimp could want.

The vision cut out, and Gregory looked towards Greg.

"What's the secret?" asked Greg.

"No more excuses." Gregory said with such finality that reality vibrated,

Then Gregory disappeared like he had never been there.


End file.
